A tribute to Condoleeza Rice and George W. Bush who, despite voluminious evidence to the contrary, said, "I don't think anybody could have predicted that these people would take an airplane and slam it into the World Trade Center, take another one and slam it into the Pentagon, that they would try to use an airplane as a missile," adding that "even in retrospect" there was "nothing" to suggest that" and "I don't think anyone anticipated the breach of the levees," respectively.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Get a $300 Scholarship to Liberty University 

All you need is a credit card and $950.00 worth of credit. Here's how it works: You enroll in Liberty's two year study program which costs $1,250.00. If you pay $950.00 of this 'tuition' with your credit card, and Liberty gives you a $300.00 "scholarship." Perhaps you're one of those liberal heathens who think, "Hey, that sounds an awful lot like a discount for adding $950.00 to a credit card balance and not really a scholarship," but, as usual, your left-wing, traitorous ass would be mistaken. Or, you may wonder if this "scholarship" applies to upfront cash payments too.

I remember students earning academic scholarships based on achievement. I remember scholarships based on entry to certain professions. I remember scholarships based on athletic ability for the free "farm system" colleges provide to professional sports. I remember scholarships which were steered to members of particular minority groups. But I don't remember a discount of tuition being deemed a scholarship based on the prompt payment of that tuition by credit card.

I have to commend the thinkers at Liberty for this innovation. Perhaps this notion can be expanded to real universities nationwide. Then, graduates can pad their resumes with the claim that they were "scholarship recipients" which sounds much better than if it was called what it actually is.

So, if you've got a grand to spare that you haven't used up at the gas station, sign up now.

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